Power

I think the biggest thing I really KNOW now as a result of this trip is the POWER of our Lord.  I get so worried.  So sure that if I don't do it it won't get done.  so many things I think are like this. I think about getting every check mark on that to-do list.  from little things - can't go to sleep without doing the dishes - to big things - telling people about the love and acceptance of Jesus Christ.  

I put this weight on my shoulders like I am in charge.  But that's my ego-self.  To think I think that I have any control over anything important!  I saw God do the impossible this trip - so many legs made, so many people told that Jesus loves them, a one-ply AK socket without any test sockets!  And I really felt my helplessness of it all.  

These are skills I know I don't have, things I'm can't even pretend to be in control of.  

And God really showed me that if He wants something done it WILL be done.  He can work through any hands.   He can train in ways we understand - school, my recent transfemoral patient who's residual limb is very similar to my Ghana transfemoral patient.  But He can also just do it Himself.  Through our incapable hands and mouths.  

This is what I MUST hold on to.  Real confidence in the ALMIGHTY - all powerful, all capable, all knowing Lord.  Closeness and trust in His provision.  That He walks inside me, determining my course and weaving His will.  We don;t have the perspective to understand it fully, but I believe He gave me a glimpse.  And taught me that I haven't REALLY trusted, REALLY leaned on His power and His provision.  I've pretended to trust thinking that my ego-self can take care of it if He doesn't come through.  and now I know that I can't but He CAN.  and He does.  

So from Ephesians 1 and 2 - 

the eyes of my heart have been enlightened.  I now know

 - the hope I am called to

- the riches of my inheritance - constant, eternal true love starting now and continuing forever

 - HIS incomparably GREAT power - His mighty strength that raised Christ from the dead and now is IN me through His Holy Spirit. 

I am sinful and selfish, following the ways of the world and gratifying the cravings of my sinful nature, But my Lord gives me GRACE.  He made me alive with Christ, raised me up in Him and seated me next to Him.  He is saving me a place as His beloved. 

I am God's workmanship - created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for me to do. 

And I can trust without anxiety that what God wills WILL HAPPEN.  Exactly as He wants.  God can bring good from evil and production from failure.  

Reflections - Selflessly - less-Leigh

First of many.  and I really need to expand these 2 sentence blog posts.  such a rich experience deserves more words.  and pictures!  and video! 

So here I am bombarded by the real world again.  I've spent the last 10 days completely outside of regular life in so many ways.  I think the most striking thing to me is how self-centered my life is.  I don't necessarily mean entirely focused on me, but I mean more entirely driven by me and my desires and my have-to's and my todo lists and my whims.  Everything I do is about me.  Even the things I think I make myself do - all driven by me and my decisions and my list of what's important.  Some things more self-centered than others - the daily chocolate, guitly pleasure of "So you think you can Dance" on TV, and others seemingly others centered - time at Agape Corner Boarding school.  But really all decided by me, all prioritized by me.  The past 10 days I have been completely out of my control.  every timeline, every action all either decided for me or focused outward.  Peter and Gracie in control of where and when and what I eat and do and go.  Working all day long with other people in mind.  Truly very refreshing.  Frustrating sometimes - 9th straight dinner at the Novotel - but refreshing.  Living without focusing on myself.  Will have to think more about this.  Obviously can't live letting someone else make all your decisions for you, but I think we are called to live less-Leigh.  

Sunday

Back to the US.  11 hours on the plane + 2 hours on the tarmack at JFK = me missing my connection and subsequent breakdown at the Delta counter.  But my sobs could not even get a flinch from the Delta agent.  Ended up in Richmond where the awesome boyfriend Eric picked me up.  We finally got home at 3:00 am!  

Saturday

We said we would be done Friday, but we all really knew we'd be back Saturday.  Ali came back for some more gait training, and I laminated and fit Faustina, an older woman who has been wearing an exoskeletal leg that she's had for a long long time.  

We finished up around 1:00 and said our goodbyes.  

Then - to the market!  madness!  But a fun experience.  the best part was the concert we got by people there - drums and singing and everything.  Quite an experience. We hit the pool afterwards to get the grossness off.  At the market there are porta-potties with direct pipes out of the shelter and on to the ground.  and plenty of people who don't bother going into the porta-potty at all. 

We cleaned up nicely for a delicious dinner at a new locale - the La Palm!  Gorgeous, and a birthday cake too!  Daniel Kodi and his wife joined us to for a real send off.  A birthday celebration for me and a celebration of a week of hard labor with lots to show for it. 

Friday

Longest day ever! Stayed at the clinic till 7:00! Fit Margaret and Sarah (transfemoral!) and Nana and laminated and fit Ali! Sarah's leg was a 1 ply fit! Ischial Containment! A miracle. I was so tired by the end of the day that I could not speak at all. But it's not every birthday that 30 Ghanians sing you Happy Birthday! their birthday song is 3 verses long. Unfortunantly becuase I insisted that I had to fit Ali (the 11 year old) today, we missed our reservation at the different resturant. So we ate at the Novotel again! gross. but at least I was able to fall asleep with the lights on and tv on at 9:00.

Thursday

Lamination Mania Day! Daniel Kodi told me "You are WOMAN!"

Wednesday

Today I fit Rejoice! And modified two transtibials with Wellbeck, the slowest of the slow.

Tuesday

Today even more people showed up! Turns out Gracie and her prostheses were on the front cover of the Ghana Times. I feel like the people and the molds are multiplying!
Took 2 more casts today - both transtibial. One was an 11 year old boy who lost his leg when he fell off a "play" train that was in the playground. I guess its a real train in a public park! His leg was amputated 4 years ago and this will be his first prosthesis.
Then I got to work with the modifying. Did all 3 transtibials from yesterday and 2 transfemoral. And we had to re-laminate Rejoice's leg =(. The lamination did not set up on the inside. Chubby (the head tech there and workforce of the Ghana team) tells me that the hardener we used is 4 years old. Might have something to do with it.
But to sum up - today I took 2 molds, modified 4 (including one AK) and did a lamination. Quite a days work. Everything has been moving so fast! I know (and my co-workers can attest) I do not have the skills to work this fast and (hopefully). Truly I believe that it is the power of the Holy Spirit. I am the hands of Christ. He works through me.

Day 4

Quickly- so tired!! Worker SO hard all day!
But - showed up to the clinic today to a crowd outside the door. Word got out that we were in town! Plaster was flying everywhere! I took several more molds - Georgina - a 32 year old transtibial amputee, Margaret - youngish woman transibial, and Sarah - 30 year old transfemoral. I'm working with an orthotist named Wellbeck - me taking some molds, him taking some, "teaching" him the ropes. Not sure if he wants tolearn from me, but I guess you have to start somewhere! Sarah is going to be a challenge. transfemoral in 2 days!! craziness.
Sleep is necessary now.another day at it tomorrow.
forgot onething - we met the vice president of Ghana today! pretty cool.